Just about everything "life is good"

There is a reason why this picture is my background (pictured above^). It is the only habitat where the polka dot frog dendrobates mysteriosus resides. That singular hillside. It is also absolutely stunning. All of nature is. I have lived in Colorado all of my life, 18 years. And no matter what; It amazes me everyday.

The vast fields and their shadowed contours.

The blueish mountains that make me think of campouts and my father playing guitar while singing through the whole forest with the whole church in chorous.

The lichen, oh god the lichen! Don't get me started on the lichen. The algae/fungus flows and thrives across the granite boulders in perfect symbiotic beauty.

The pine needles under my feet and the pure mountain air. ahhh. smells good every time.

The mountain stars; unadulterated by light.

In case you didn't know, I LOVE the colour green. So what a gift it is by nature to give me trees that are always green! The conifers. Their bark could be a part of the mountains themselves. Everytime I see them, it is always a random memory synapse of flutes; yes, flutes, people singing, a fire, me with my dog at my feet, and the greatest place to temporarily put your mind, into the fire itself. But most of all, the nature around me. Every campout ended in an argument with my mom about wether or not I could bring home all the rocks, sticks, mosses, plants, bugs, salamanders, and assorted organisms home. We will be doing a lot of these this summer (not the arguments of course.)

I was thinking early on tonight (which was last night, I had to save and quit), I was thinking about dirt. How do you feel about dirt? Better yet, how would you feel living in it? What if you spent your life immersed in dirt? What goes on in that dark underworld? Ever since I was little I wanted to dig tunnels under my backyard and live in them; Crawl in them; make my own little catacombs out of them. When I look at dirt now I think of decomposition and that elaborate process that means so much to our life here on earth. Why do we litter? let me tell you why, because we are so used to knowing that whatever we throw onto the ground will somehow dissappear if given enough time. Could you say that we are too comfortable with that luxury? I could not tell you.

I am a naturalist, but not an environmentalist. Because although we are different from other species, what are we but our adaptions? It is the natural inclination for a human to be resourceful. It is the natural inclination of all species to survive. and that is all we have done. Nothing can leave the earth. It is all contained by gravity. Those resources we use just become re-arranged. Everything that occures in the universe is just re-arrangements of molecules. If the environmantalists were true to their nature they would allow the temporary destructive path of humans. Because it is only destroying ourselves. Environmentalists should know that they cannot change human nature. Thats why I say, give the people an alternative not an ultimatum. Lead by example, not by assumed authority.

Here is a qoute from one of my favorite teachers, Steve Kaye, " A species is a species because it can be." It took me a while to understand the meaning of that. But it has always been what I believe. To bring forward in complete overkill I will say the Nietzche qoute, "The greatest mistake man could make is to believe he is the sum and measure of all things." but these qoutes go hand in hand. The biggest explaination for why we have a higher cause is that we are the top of the food chain, the most advanced. This is so wrong its not even funny. We are no more advanced than a common housefly. In terms of advancement a species can be defined by how long it has survived on earth and its relation to its original form. How much have we changed from our common ancestor? Not as much as you could say for other species. If you were to count success as the longest lasting species, we could lose there as well. There are trees that have seen the end of the dinosaurs. We have barely been around for a geologic blink of an eye. We are not better than any other species or worse, a species is a species because it can be. Each species on earth has adapted perfectly to its situation. That is nothing that we as humans can judge. Can we live underwater? I guess the fish made the best of that situation better than we ever could have. What is the use of our brains if we were put into a different situation? What use does a parameceum (small single celled organism that lives in water.) have of deep thought? The deep thinking parameceum do not survive. Sure we are advanced, but in relation so is a mollusk.

We are the product of thousands of generations of organisms before us, working as hard as they can to get us here. To bring the viewpoint to a more narrow understanding, our generation (as in me and you.) is the work of all our forefathers working lifelong to provide us the tools to live; and by procreation, our lives themselves. And finally if you believe in such a thing; to bring the viewpoint to its highest, life itself was the product of God hard at work. So if you are ever confronting this god, keep in mind how much he has actually done, and how much you really do not know about him. Which gives me a new question, Do followers of god or even prophets, believe that they truly know and understand him? Because although they say they do not, they make judgements on people and decisions that say they do.

But another feeling that can be derived from dirt and decompisition is dark. It is of death. Although we are not aware of it, we are going to have to become very well aquanted with the dirt and our new decomposing neighbors. The feeling I get is not that I am going to be aware of myself decomposing, its that it is going to happen. Now I will ask all the questions that I was too afraid to ask Steve after class;

Could you revert the lack of variation in a small inbred population of endangered animals if you promoted mutations for evolutionary change?

What if we had more than one common ancestor? What if the evolutionary tree was upside down and it is narrowing with time? After all the structures and functions of a cell can happen spontaneously why couldn't it have happened more than once? Or even latter on in time. Since evolution and speciation can be random, why can't something more basic towards the first species come forth again? or constantly?

Could evolution revert back towards an old design? Could this happen to a single species? Since enviroment plays a vital role, could this happen. what happens when an Island is eroded into an atoll? Do the terrestrial species adapt, leave, or die? Couldn't the rate of this process allow favorable mutations?

If sensitivity to change is favorable, could it be favorable to vibrant? (long story here, and check it out I said my dislaimer schpeel just like I promised;
an organ system designed for “sensitivity” (fight the greyness all rights reserved to chelsea baines and corp. Chelsea Baines is not held responsible for loss of sensitivity or nerve tissues in general, failure to fight the greyness will result in permanent loss of hair and a final housing fee of 15$, fight the numbness, vibrancy might be vital to survival.)

keep in mind I did this in my notes, so it was not necessary at all. Sometimes it feels so much like people can see what I do its not even funny.

I don't know why I did not ask these questions to you Steve, but there always seemed to be some sort of barrier. I will try to answer them on my own someday.

I am so sick with Biophillia its not even funny. Today I checked off 6 tree species and one bird off of my list. I decided I love pinyon pine's and birds are so much more diverse than I perceived them to be. I watched this red sided blackbird do 4 different calls each one stranger than the next. I kept having to look around to see if another bird was making these new calls but each time to no avail. I love spring, and I love summer, I love life (both kinds of life. but mostly of other organisms.) The more and more I think about it the more I want to be a naturalist. Thats what I was trying to describe for so long. Be a nomad, devote my life to understanding Bios. (I really think the greek word for life represents it better than the english one.)

Here is a qoute from my favorite book, "The Fruit Hunters."

"After a fruit rots and decomposes, the seeds live on. Nature is a feedback loop, from putrefaction to perfection and back again.

Humankind only learned that seeds grow into plants around ten thousand years ago. The miracle of vegatative growth seemed to shed light into the mystery of our own lives. Seeds go in the soil - like dead people. Perhaps that meant that something equally magical might happen to our own bodies-and souls-after death."

speaking of which this is a great book and flippin' Rachel needs to flippin' read it and I need to stop flippin' forgetting to give it to her. and I feel like writing a poem,

What is life to me?

a platform for things, "to do"?

a medium between much better things?

Is it a looking glass for me to see?

Such further, more fantastic things

but of all things, such as life; meant to be free

So what is life to me?

Ah! a beetle walking cross my palm

so that is what life means to me

Nothing puts a better picture in my head than a poem, duress seems to spawn creativity. It seems when you give a person rules, that is when they will try to break them and in a way that they can be praised for. The rhythem of a poem not only paints a picture for your eyes, but for your ears as well. If I were to read a song about birds, I would more than likely hear those birds in the rhythem of the poem. Music is the ultimate joy of humanity, but so can be language. To combine the two, wow, what a dream! Oh wait; thats poetry.

So to sum up my random freight train of thoughts,

I am joyous to have someone who listens to what I have to say and my questions.

I am joyous to have someone who gives feedback and genuinely understands.

I am joyous to have someone who will always stand by my side.

I am joyous that this person desires my desires.

I am joyous that there is someone else who desires a higher cause as do I.

I am joyous that there is also someone who seeks the truth as do I.

I am joyous that there is a person I would sacrifice for, without the desire to be martyr, just to give this person life.

Wow, thats cool, I am joyous today, with the promise of being joyous forever. All of the sudden these things have not become a safety net but rather, The Noblest Cause!!!!!!!!!!!