Heaven is where you make it

Ah Hawaii, I am glad that I can finally have a secret place to write about what has been tugging at my heart all my life. Ever since third grade that has been where I've wanted to go. But there is an even deeper place, long before that.

Rainforest's





Jungles

My all time favorite movie that I started watching before I can remember was the jungle book. I don't remember Mowgli. Last time I checked I was Mowgli. One of the most profound visuals I have had in my life (can't remember what I was on.) Was of the ending scene in that movie; Floating down a jungle river looking back at the orange sunset behind. The sheer beauty and memory of it permeates my skin and releases in the form of shivers throughout my body just thinking of it.

As much as I will miss Colorado, as much as I will miss the Lichen,
As much As I will miss my friends, and all the places I've been,
The evergreens call inbetween, fond memories left in kisses on my forehead
The world calls or is it them?
those people of my past?
eons before my time
enriched in mother nature
she calls my name I cannot stay, the ocean breeze still blows my way
but yet I will miss them.

(I feel as if this next part is to somebody.)
Is it the rainforest's I dream of or is it the world itself?

What is to stop me from embracing the Mowgli that I really am? My perfect scores mean nothing. My money earned means nothing. My status in society, my impression left in peoples minds, my ego, my ideas, they all mean nothing. My memories, my friends, all life around me oh wait, now that means something. Where else would be better for me?

I am sick with Biophillia (the love of life)

I want to be so surrounded by life that I cannot breath new air that I am not sharing with my fellow organisms. Oh what a joy it would be to be a tree in a forest. My roots reaching out and touching rocks, soil, worms, water, streams, ants, and other plants all at the same time. my branches touching birds, frogs, monkeys, lizards, and holding them up from danger. My leaves warm with sunlight and giving me energy at the crack of dawn every day. My trunk is home to all sorts of birds and small mammals. My experience in time itself is so enriched I can smile at all the repeats. Of course to be realistic this is nothing like being a tree, but its just an analogy.

but at the same time there is another side of me. Although enjoying all these things around myself, I am a scared. scared for the future. What will become of all the other people like me? The ones that neither know nor care what happens to our little community. What should I do they are just as important to me? I almost care for them to much because I believe it is a necessity for them to keep discovering and going forward at the expense of their competition. If only there was an easier way! How much can I do to keep both of them happy? Is that too selfish and presumptuous of me?

So it seems it would be better if I chose the harder path so that I can have both of my friends. Its time to change the world for a noble cause. but I shall have to see the world first.