Memories

I do not want to ask this question, I want you to ask it to yourself,

What is my life?

or better yet,

what is my life composed of?

how did I learn?

I will try and sum it up with this, memories. (if you would care to object I would be thrilled.) How do we know who we are looking at in the mirror is us? because we have seen ourselves in the mirror before? It is a lot like the question how did the universe* start? sure we know how planets are formed, just like we are sure that every time we turn around to look back in the mirror it will be the same person.

But is that a reason to believe that person is you? I am sure that if you have taken what I said literally you could say, "well you know that the mirror reflects because everything in the mirror you can look at with your own eyes next to you and see that it is identical. ) but isn't that the way we do all things in life? Looking to "others" for reassurance? Why can't we find the answer in ourselves? Why can't you look at a mirror and realise that the person you see there does not at all look like the person your eyes are sitting inside and what you imagined you look like? Isn't that the problem with beauty? When you are told what beauty is you see it in yourself, regardless of selfishness or confidence. But when you look to compare it to a mirror you don't look beautiful at all. Im telling you if you take away mirrors anorexia is not a problem.

Isn't it the mirror that gives a physicality to beauty? When someone says you are beautiful what does it feel like they are talking about? It feels like everything. like as a person thats what you are. Your thoughts are beautiful, your personailty is beautiful, your accomplishments are beautiful, and yes your physicality too. But without a mirror physicality is so much different. When you look into someone elses eyes it invokes a totally different feeling than seeing eyes in the mirror or in a picture or anything other than in person. I always hear people talk about the depth of someones eyes when they look into them. Just the term looking INTO someones eyes explains it right there. When you look someone in the eyes you are not looking AT their eyes, you are looking INTO their eyes.

but to go back to life, Memories are what it is composed of. When life is flashing before your eyes those are memories. but is it? no, you are right. your life can be accomplishments too. but isn't that dependant on other people? If there is nobody in your life to tell you, you have accomplished anything, does it matter? Kind of like that phrase if a tree fell in a forest with nobody there to hear it does it make a sound? But it is more like if you were that tree that was falling and you knew it and nobody was there to let you know you were falling or that it means anything, would it even be necessary to make a sound or to be concious of your fall?

What about that saying at the end of the movie Donnie Darko, Everyone dies alone. Physically yes everyone dies alone. Nobody can die with you they can just be there with you in your last moments of living. After that you are sucked into a different part of the world that they cannot know until they die too. If you believe in god than in that moment where you are separated from your friends and heaven, will you feel lonly and scared? And if you don't believe in god your last moments of thinking before you cannot think again are, in lonliness and fright. What a horrible end to a wonderful life. Thats why it is almost impossible to not believe in a god because who would want that? but what I warn you, and by that I mean everyone, is to not use that as a way to reassure yourself and calm down your fears.

Because if there is an almighty father of the heavens I know that he would not want you to use him as a means to cope with death or any sort of troubles facing you. It is not something to be used lightly as a coping mechanism.

He designed you to be contemplative, he designed you to have such an emotional burden, he designed you to have such a passionate desire, he designed you to have doubt in the highest degree, He designed you to BE MORE. So if you are going to make claims that you believe in him I want to see you be what he wants you to be, what he designed you to be.

but once again what is life but your precious memories, when all else fails you what do you have but your memories to hold onto? and holy shit! I actually answered one of my own questions, wow.

Life is a prospect of the future; Life is a contentment at what you have done and lived well, Life is something of such variables nothing can compare, it is of hate, love, thought, spirit, lonliness, acceptance, joyfulness, weariness, lessons, questions, answers, heat, cold, feeling and numbness, it is of the wonders of the imagination and complete unadulterated realism at the same time, it can be fake, real, lost, found, profound and wise, content, and so much more.

It can give you thoughts you could maintain your whole life or reject in a matter of seconds. What is one possible scenario that someone hasen't lived out in full succession. The wonders of nature rival all sorts of physical laws and outcomes. Who can stop life? Nothing. Yes I said it. As short as the time life has spent in existance what can stop the progress that humans have become? We have done some things in 100 years that no other organism has been able to do since the dawn of life.

Yes life IS vibrant! Vibrancy is nothing the can be snuffed out like a candle. What is to stop something from being vibrant? Or a better question would be, what would have the odacity to? What would have the desire to stop something from being vibrant? It can live in a memory, a moment, an expectation, and within all living things. Most of all IT CAN LIVE!

So what is life? funny question, because I haven't even scratched the surface.